Dear Ella;

Last night was rough! Your little teeth are taking their sweet time coming in and it seems to be keeping you up at night. Last night when you woke up at 11, which is very odd for you to wake up that early, I thought you were going right back to sleep as you nursed. As soon as I laid you down, your eyes popped open and you were wide awake. I thought if I let you lay there you would put yourself to sleep, wrong. I watched you on your monitor, as you scooted yourself around your crib, checking out the animals on your bumper for almost an hour. You finally started to drift off but you were up against the bumper, so I came in when I thought you were sleeping to scoot you away from it, pop went your eyes as soon as I touched you. I got the biggest smile, and just like every smile, my heart melted a little more.
I decided to try and nurse you a little more and see if you could get to sleep that way. As we sat there rocking you to sleep, you carressed my hair as you nursed, and then right before you fell asleep you grabbed on to my thumb and just gave it a little squeeze. I couldn’t help it, I cried. It was such a sweet little gesture and a moment I will always remember. It was something that you have done several times before, but this time it was different somehow, it was one of the sweetest moments of my life.
When you woke up an hour and a half later, at 1:30, you went to sleep a little easier. At 4:15, you popped right back up when I laid you down but then you talked yourself back to sleep. I felt so bad waking you up at 5:45. But now, as I watch you sleeping in the pack N play behind me at work, I know that every sleepless night is so worth it. If I could survive I would stay awake every second of the day just taking you in.
I love you more then you will ever know.
~Mommy

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